Category Archives: Family

FINDING MY JOY IN MY PURPOSE

Since June 27th when my best friend was in a horrible freak accident, I have had a hell of a year. I thought I had lost myself totally again and would not bounce back this time.

At the time of her accident I already felt like I was barely hanging on to my faith, hope and love. I for sure felt like my joy was very low! Then when she left us July 1st there was nothing left but anger and grief.

When I came back to Oklahoma in 2017 the life I had was very different than the one I came back here to have. I kept holding on to the things of the past. The platforms I had and purpose I felt I had before my seperation and divorce was lost in the transition.

I stepped completely out of “ministry” a couple of years ago and eventually found myself struggling to even go to church and forcing myself to go. I sure haven’t been consistent with when I have gone. I have lots of reasons on this but most are probably excuses. When Covid shutdown happened is when I really lost that main connection.

Covid pandemic exposed so much in this world and in even my own heart. I found anger and disappointment in humanity was a major part of my spiraling 🌀 down the wrong emotional path.

In 2013 or even before that, I had started a journey of promoting and encouraging other businesses and ministries. Part of what I did was book a couple of Christian country artist, had a blog, did interviews, podcast and even had a radio show. So when I came back here that entire life was entangled with my divorce and pain. I would try and try to make it still work and it didn’t ever go anywhere.

It wasn’t until I lost Maver that I realized I had already spent the last 6 years living in a continuous state of grief. I read a post that said we don’t just grieve the ones we loose but we grieve the dreams and what would have been in the future with them. I was still grieving the loss of my dreams. Not really the person I left but all that was connected to that life.

Yes I did stop doing ministry and even really walking in the things I did before but I was living even though I felt like I wasn’t living the best life I knew I could be living.

I believe 100% that having my family close by and having all of my farm animals in my small backyard farm is what’s kept me wanting to even be here at all to try to live with a purpose again.

A talk with my daughter about my old blog and website is what opened my eyes to realize I still have as much purpose, passion and vision as I always have. IT JUST LOOKS DIFFERENT!

One of my life long friends has been on a journey of finding her place and where God wants her again. I have been with her this weekend in OKC to help get her moved. She is moving back to Tulsa and going to Victory church which is my all time favorite church. So I will have a place to go stay with some and attend this place to fill up with hope, love and joy. I have my small home church group local as well. It’s important to have a place to remind you that God is Hope, Love and Joy!

After talking to my daughter and creating a new blog, website and social media platform, I have been having so much fun, especially this weekend. I had so much fun and knew that I was going to be okay. I felt alive again. I talked to vendors and the Farmers Market and networked.

I love it that I can help promote and encourage others in a totally different area of life and still bring them hope, love and joy.

I love learning about growing my backyard farm Cross G Backyard Farms and excited about what the future with this will bring.

I would love to even set up a farmers market at my place this spring and bring others together to share their business and dreams. So many ideas again. So many possibilities!!!

I know this was a long post but I wanted to share what’s been happening in my heart and life in hopes it will encourage you.

YOU ARE MISSED DAILY MY FRIEND

Blessings from Cross G Backyard Farms

Eph 3:20

Cassie G

Week 2 Of Slow Down

As y’all know we are finding ourself facing a situation in our Country and World that we have never faced before. A lot of unknowns, fears and obstacles. We do not know who or what to believe.

There is one thing I know and that is we CAN TRUST AND BELIEVE GOD.

I will tell you how I am dealing with all of this. There are moments I am not dealing well. I allow a thought to get out of control. I binge eat, I get angry, and I spiral out on some social media rant or vent to a friend. I could pretend I have it all together or I can be real and honest. So I’m going with real and honest.

Now I will not leave it at the negative side of things. Here is what I do when I find myself doing the things above. I stop and force my phone out of my hand and turn on Praise and worship music. I turn my alerts off on my phone. I will turn on a podcast that is funny or a sermon podcast.

I have been waking up every night with a feeling of “what will I find has happened while I was asleep?”. So I turn on my Bible app or Abide app that reads the Word to me

I have started cleaning projects and advice tips to help others out. Here is my latest one.

https://klcleaningnmore.home.blog/2020/03/23/project-fridge-time/

I have been watching my grandson to help give his parents a time out.

As of today, we have been told all non essential workers stay home. It’s yet to be determined if I am or am not included in essential workers. I clean homes. I create a safe and disinfected home for my clients. To them I am essential. However I also want to be safe and comply with this situation to get it under control.

These are thoughts I battle…

Am I carrying a life threatening virus to my clients homes or home to my family?
I am responsible for others lives in this job
If I don’t work I will have nothing because I am self employed and there is no unemployment for me or grants for me available
I need someone to make this official and make a mandatory demand so I am not carrying the weight of this decision. Stop giving me recommendations and opinions and make it a flat out clear picture.
Then it’s back to God help me trust and hear You because no one here knows what we are doing!
then usually a repeat of all the above!

I told you I was going to be honest.

So when those thoughts are overwhelming me, it’s when I have to drown them out with worship, prayer and word.

I have been taking naps, taking vitamin C, B12 and using my diffuser at night with Thieves and Peppermint oils. These are all things I am doing to keep my immune system up.

Now my biggest issue is eating too much and too often because I am inside too often. I am praying the sun is out soon here and temps rising. I need to be walking and in the sun. I have a vitamin D deficiency and it has caused physical issues as well. Oh yeah I am taking Vitamin D and Turmeric.

I have a Bible app and I look up verses on Fear, Peace, Provision and read those. I share with others what He is telling me. I am no different than anyone reading this blog. I have to fight the battle and remember He has already won the war!!

I would love to hear back from you. What verses are you standing on, what worship songs are you listening to, what projects are you doing?

Here is a list of mine.

Raise a Hallelujah song
Fear is a liar song
Psalms 91
Psalms 23
Cleaning out my fridge
Deep cleaning baseboards
Cleaning out cabinets and drawers
Gathering things to bless others
Binge watching funny shows like Golden Girls, Reba and Designing Women

Okay your turn ♥️

Dream Catcher 3:20

Cassie Gilman

Things To Do While Homebound

Okay so I truly have no clue what day this is on challenge. I barely know what day it is lol. It was after noon before I realized it was Saint Patrick’s Day.

I have made a list of things we can do at home while this situation in our country is being contained. Hope y’all can find peace and enjoy your down time.

If you have board games and cards stashed away GET THEM OUT!

Get out the coloring books and crayons
If you are out at all for supplies and can, run by a Dollar Tree you can purchase some there.

I saw some old fashion cards like go fish at Dollar Tree.
They have cards to teach kids in the school supplies section as well.

Dominos stuck down in a junk drawer? Dig them out.

Those books you have been going to read that you have in a goodwill pile now… get them back out.

Get our recipe books and teach your kids or your self lol measurements and how to make a recipe

Teach a child how to skip
Don’t have a child, skip yourself to lighten your heart and increase your heart rate

Draw a line on the side walk and play that old game we played as kids. Not sure the name lol NOT DOGE BALL, that’s just mean lol. You hit the back back and forth to each other for points

Shoot hoops, play HORSE

Play duck duck goose with your kids or
Jump rope

Stay physical and
don let depression take root.
Don’t let fear take root either.

I’m getting myself a coloring book
Find your inner child again!!!

Sing some VBS songs like Jesus loves me, This Little Light Of Mine, Oh what’s the one that says “if the devil doesn’t like it, he can sit on a tack” lol

These are just a few ideas I had. If you have any to share, I would love to hear them.

Dream Catcher 3:20

Cassie Gilman

My message on the Corona

Day 11. Well it’s actually day 12. However, I skipped yesterday.

I went and got some supplies and food to have for the emergency situation we have found ourselves in. I did not hoard, even though my mind fought fear in this area. I watched others struggling with fear, hoarding water, toilet paper and no wipes to be found in the store.

I have been up for hours now, listening to the word, and this message was strong in me.

THIS IS LONG BUT ON MY HEART.

I myself have wanted to have the attitude of this won’t happen here, this is a conspiracy, this is over dramatic etc, this is government control etc…

Churches canceling seems like a plot in a rapture movie…

Hear me out and no judging me. Y’all have your thoughts and questions!

Here is the truth WE ARE THE CHURCH!!

We can worship God with our families at home. This can not stop us from being the church.

Yes there are many issues with this situation. However IF WE DO NOT STOP PANICKING it will only get worse.

We can not keep running in masses to the stores and hoarding supplies. Number one your being selfish and greedy. Number two your in A CROWD of people 🤦‍♀️

Number three those who want to say it’s all fake and not serious, maybe it is and maybe it’s not. But why take a chance???

I have a new grandbaby on the way. Let me tell you this… the fact that hospitals in Italy have to turn away patients who need to be there for delivery of babies, HEART ATTACKS, STROKES, TRAUMA etc… because it’s filled with patients with this 🦠 virus means pull our heads out of the media, get on our faces before God, listen to our leader WHO GOD PLACED THERE that is saying if at all possible JUST STAY HOME.
Listen that is very hard for me. I hate being stuck at home.

I can go to work and clean homes making their homes a more sterile place to help them as well. I am blessed with my line of work.

If I go out I can respect the wash hands and don’t touch face guidelines and get what I need and get out of the crowds.

We have to listen to the Holy Spirit very closely right now.

Check on our elderly and shut ins.

Be strong in our faith for those struggling with all the thoughts in our heads. When one is weak the other can pull them back up. No one and I mean NO ONE is exempt from a moment of fear or weakness. So don’t pretend your better than anyone going through this hell right now. We all have our weak areas.

Yes laugh at the funny memes and have fun but don’t let it be at the expense of someone’s weakness.

We have people with loved ones in nursing homes and prisons that they can’t get to. It’s causing major grief and fear. Respect this. Check on them. They don’t think any of this is funny right now. That’s okay. Let them feel what they feel but love them through it.

I’ll tell you right now the situation of possible domestic travel bands, possibility of being told it’s a law to stay in my home, because there are areas that are restricted, other countries have major lockdowns going on… these are issues I have literally had nightmares about for many years. Movies maybe triggered it idk but it is a fear I have dealt with. So I won’t pretend I am here having it all together.

It is however my responsibility to get in my word, crank up my worship music, tell God I am scared 💩 less and ask Him to quiet my fear with His word and love. Then it’s my responsibility to share that same word and love with my kids and all who need it.

Today is a National Day of Prayer. We have a President who has found Gods love and no he isn’t perfect but neither are we. We need to love and support him. We need to pray for him today. We need to pray for our medical personal across the world. We need to pray for our politicians, those on the teams with cdc and leadership roles making life choices for us right now.
We need to pray for peace in our hearts, in our homes, in our cities. NOW IS THE TIME TO FORGIVE PEOPLES SHORTCOMINGS AND BIND TOGETHER AS FAMILY, BIND TOGETHER AS THE CHURCH, BIND TOGETHER AS A COMMUNITY, BIND TOGETHER AS A NATION!!!

And for the Love of GOD ♥️(for reals) SHARE THE 🧻 🧻🧻🧻🧻🧻 TOILET PAPER, WATER 💧 AND FOOD 🥘 YALL STORED UP IN FEAR!!

God will provide.

Thankful Thursday

Okay so first I need to say, I didn’t skip day 8 lol. This blog challenge has been fun. I actually did day 8 on my business blog. I am going to insert the link here, so you can check it out.

https://klcleaningnmore.home.blog/2020/03/11/a-favorite-product-of-mine/

Now for day 9!

Thankful Thursday

I slept in this morning and for that I am very thankful. I also had a text from someone close to me saying it was Thankful Thursday. They told me how thankful they are for me. What they didn’t know is that was my blog choice of the day!

I am thankful for so many things, places and people in my life. I am thankful that 3 years ago on this very date, God didn’t allow things to go too far so that there was no second chances in life.

I am thankful that though my heart has been broken more times than I can count, I serve the ONE who mends the broken hearted.

I am thankful that over all the years of life, God has never let go of me. There are many times I tried to get out of His reach, but His arm never runs out of length to hold on to me.

I am thankful that I have 2 amazing children. I am thankful that God hand picked their spouses for them and for me. I am thankful that God has blessed them with absolutely beautiful children.

I am thankful that even though I made many mistakes as a mom, God has always had my children in His hands. His grace and love has kept them.

I am thankful that I have a home now that is big enough to have 18 people in my living room for a baby shower. My daughter is having a little girl in April and I got to host the shower.

I am thankful that I am living in the quiet small town of Welch. I always said it would be a cold day in hell before I moved back. Oh it was hell alright that brought me back. However it was God who kept me here. I have been able to SEE this place through His eyes and not past hurts and pain.

Well that about sums up today. I could sit here all day and write my list.

I would love for you to comment back with a few of your own

Dream Catcher 3:20

Cassie Gilman