Hey y’all I absolutely love this lady and this recipe sounds like it will be loved just as much.
Michelle Farley is a Texan, writer, military advocate, photographer, pie baker, wild rag maker and a Jesus lover. I have not had the honor to meet her in person YET…one day I hope to make that happen.
Please take a few minutes and head over to her website and look around and learn more about her and her beautiful Wild Rags.
Since June 27th when my best friend was in a horrible freak accident, I have had a hell of a year. I thought I had lost myself totally again and would not bounce back this time.
At the time of her accident I already felt like I was barely hanging on to my faith, hope and love. I for sure felt like my joy was very low! Then when she left us July 1st there was nothing left but anger and grief.
When I came back to Oklahoma in 2017 the life I had was very different than the one I came back here to have. I kept holding on to the things of the past. The platforms I had and purpose I felt I had before my seperation and divorce was lost in the transition.
I stepped completely out of “ministry” a couple of years ago and eventually found myself struggling to even go to church and forcing myself to go. I sure haven’t been consistent with when I have gone. I have lots of reasons on this but most are probably excuses. When Covid shutdown happened is when I really lost that main connection.
Covid pandemic exposed so much in this world and in even my own heart. I found anger and disappointment in humanity was a major part of my spiraling 🌀 down the wrong emotional path.
In 2013 or even before that, I had started a journey of promoting and encouraging other businesses and ministries. Part of what I did was book a couple of Christian country artist, had a blog, did interviews, podcast and even had a radio show. So when I came back here that entire life was entangled with my divorce and pain. I would try and try to make it still work and it didn’t ever go anywhere.
It wasn’t until I lost Maver that I realized I had already spent the last 6 years living in a continuous state of grief. I read a post that said we don’t just grieve the ones we loose but we grieve the dreams and what would have been in the future with them. I was still grieving the loss of my dreams. Not really the person I left but all that was connected to that life.
Yes I did stop doing ministry and even really walking in the things I did before but I was living even though I felt like I wasn’t living the best life I knew I could be living.
I believe 100% that having my family close by and having all of my farm animals in my small backyard farm is what’s kept me wanting to even be here at all to try to live with a purpose again.
A talk with my daughter about my old blog and website is what opened my eyes to realize I still have as much purpose, passion and vision as I always have. IT JUST LOOKS DIFFERENT!
One of my life long friends has been on a journey of finding her place and where God wants her again. I have been with her this weekend in OKC to help get her moved. She is moving back to Tulsa and going to Victory church which is my all time favorite church. So I will have a place to go stay with some and attend this place to fill up with hope, love and joy. I have my small home church group local as well. It’s important to have a place to remind you that God is Hope, Love and Joy!
After talking to my daughter and creating a new blog, website and social media platform, I have been having so much fun, especially this weekend. I had so much fun and knew that I was going to be okay. I felt alive again. I talked to vendors and the Farmers Market and networked.
I love it that I can help promote and encourage others in a totally different area of life and still bring them hope, love and joy.
I love learning about growing my backyard farm Cross G Backyard Farms and excited about what the future with this will bring.
I would love to even set up a farmers market at my place this spring and bring others together to share their business and dreams. So many ideas again. So many possibilities!!!
I know this was a long post but I wanted to share what’s been happening in my heart and life in hopes it will encourage you.
YOU ARE MISSED DAILY MY FRIEND
Blessings from Cross G Backyard Farms
Eph 3:20
Cassie G
Five weeks ago today, my life was altered forever. Tuesday June 27th, started out like any other day. I had a slow work day for some reason and I was feeling extra tired so I was just hanging around the house. My phone rang at 11:22 am and I had also missed a text that said “what ya doin my friend”.
I answered the call and it was my best friend of 30 years. She was headed to Walmart and wanted to know what I was doing. Well all she had to say to me was Walmart and I was busy lol. I hate going to Walmart so I wasn’t about to be like oh yeah I’ll go with you. She knew the answer before she called but she had to try. She asked me about running an errand for her and then decided she had it covered. I knew that I would go on and clean the house I had scheduled and when I got back I would get my daily afternoon text saying what ya doin now? Then I would debate going over to the farm or chatting on the phone instead. This was a daily thing for years now.
Around 3pm my brother text me and said “what are you doing?” I said “currently sitting on my butt on the couch”. He replied with “at your house”. My brother, his fiancé and I have a garden together so I thought he was saying he was at my house. I figured he was ready to pick green beans. I looked outside and didn’t see him, I thought well I will go out and get started while he gets here.
I walked outside and headed to the garden that hot day and as feeling whiny cause I was tired. As I stepped towards the garden something inside me said “something isn’t right, that text is gonna be a bad thing”. I turned around and nervously went to pilfering in my vehicle while waiting to see what direction he drove in from. I told myself if he comes from his house and in the Ranger it is ok but if he comes from the other way and in his truck this is bad.
In just a few minutes I saw him coming in his truck and my heart started sinking. I knew he was bringing me bad news. See my brother is a local firefighter and knows before most what’s happened in the community.
My brother pulled up and in a tone that verified my fear, he says “Cassie where is Dawni?” Dawni is my daughter so my heart started beating so fast. I said “I guess at home. Why?” He started to proceed to tell me I needed to stay calm. I then didn’t stay calm at all. I begin almost yelling and cussing at him to start talking and talk fast. My head was going so fast. I thought wow why would he come to tell me if it was my deployed son, he’s too calm for it to be my parents or sister, he asked where Dawni is so it’s not her. Are my grandkids with her?, where is Josh(her husband)?
My brother said “Cassie it’s Maver. There’s been an accident and a tree fell on her car and she’s been life flighted”. What? My head started spinning and there was nothing in me at all that was calm.
The reason he had asked where my daughter was is he had been up working all night and day. He wanted to have someone drive me safely to the hospital. My daughter didn’t hear her phone so he said “you stay right here. I mean it don’t you get in that car and leave here. I am going to get Megan and Andi and I will be back to get you”.
I made a call to another firefighter friend. I said” I know you know and you need to start talking. I want to know the truth”. He didn’t give me any details either. They were doing their jobs by not giving details. They was also both protecting me.
They came and picked me up and drove me to the hospital. All of our heads were spinning. This was such a freak accident that the spinning still continues. A couple of hours after I thought my brother and them had left, he text and they had gotten me a coffee. I was wondering why he who had no sleep was still there when I thought they went home. My brother knew in his mind and heart that I was facing a very dark time ahead of me. He talked to me about no matter what I have to stay calm and not react to anything that gets said or happens.
The next 4 days were a roller coaster of ups and downs. Hope then no hope. I only left the hospital when I absolutely had to for work. Saturday July 1st my best friend took her last breath and went to be with Jesus. I was angry, sad, numb, and actually went into shock.
Sunday morning after staying in a hotel that my brother and Megan put me up in, I left and headed home. I called my daughter and was having a discussion about plans for the evening. I hung up and then we talked again in a few minutes. Apparently when on the first call, I slipped into a discussion I thought I was having with my best friend. Sunday was always the same discussion if we wasn’t at camp. We would discuss the plans for the evening. I would always ask her if we was having a cookout and was we having a bonfire. When my daughter said “mom I thought you wanted a bonfire and to grill out.” I was like what?
I can not tell you how confused I felt when we begin to go back and forth on me having this discussion about bonfires and grilling. I insisted I never said such a thing. I did though!! When I got home and realized it was Sunday, I totally freaked out. What is wrong with me was screaming in my head. Did I have a stroke because my BP was out of control by this point. Monday after hours of out of control BP I ended up in the urgent care. I was diagnosed with shock and anxiety.
Grief is so weird. Grief can effect your health, mental status and your spirit. I was a mess for days. There are days I start out thinking okay I am feeling okay and this is going to be a good day. Before that day is over I have found myself in a state of overwhelming grief.
Last night I was at my work, where I clean an office and I did something embarrassing. Well it wouldn’t have been had no one been in there. Unfortunately there was a lady left in her office and I had no idea. When I realized and they had left, I reached for my phone to do what I would have always done. You guessed it… call my bff! Suddenly the air sucked out of the room and I gasped for air.
Maver and I went in on a swap meet spot with my parents. Now my mom has set up since the accident but I have not. Here in a few days I will face my first swap with out her. Part of me says nope I am not doing it. The other part of me who can’t get into my garage from all the swap meet items says YES YOU ARE GOING! There will be many many first with out her through this next year.
I also know in my grief that if I am feeling this bad, this means her husband, kids, grandkid, and parents feel it even more deeply. This makes the grief more intense to see others also hurting. One thing for sure is we are in it together and we can help each other through it.
Grief has its cycles and there is no order in which they cycle. I am pretty sure I’ve experienced all feelings at the same time on somedays. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance are the cycles. The bargaining ended at that hospital on July 1st. The other cycles have been a roller coaster ride. I have God, family and friends that are helping me get through this season and for that I am so grateful.
If you have found yourself in a season of grief, it’s very important to have a great support system. There are support groups even on social media if you don’t have a local support system.
My friend hated having her photo taken. She took this one with me just for me. I knew it was a sacrificial act of love.
I hope my story helps you and you know your not alone in your season of grief.
Dream Catcher 3:20
Cassie
START SMALL BUT START NOW!!!
What can you do right now that is towards your dreams and goals?
I know someone who has written out choices for names, menu ideas, started experimenting with what they might want to serve in a restaurant type business. They are not sitting around waiting until the mother load 💰 drops in their laps to just open it.
I created a name in 2010 for my dream. I had the logo designed by my daughter. I created a social media presence and it is 2023 and still in a process of getting to where I want it!
I live in town but dream of owning a small place in the country for cattle and a horse. I started with being homeless when I moved here to renting in 5 months to owning in 3 years. I started with chickens at my second rental home and now have ducks, chickens and a goat! One day I will have a place or be connected with a place to have the other livestock as well.
I also want to travel and camp all over places. I watch videos and learn how to cook, what items I need for traveling like that. I have been purchasing items a little at a time.
I am building an outdoor Dutch oven and kitchen are. I watch videos and gather and build one piece at a time.
Never sit on your bum and let it all pass by.
Also don’t get your undies in a bunch when you see someone else step out to do your dream! All that says is IT IS POSSIBLE! It doesn’t say well I can’t now because they did it first!
The Holidays are upon us. We are all thinking and planning out all of our menus and traditions. Some are creating brand new ones for their families.
I asked for some help from blogger groups on social media to share some traditions with y’all. I absolutely love learning about different cultural or regional traditions. I hope you enjoy reading these and I would love for you to share yours with me as well.
Due to food allergies and diet preferences, my family modified our Thanksgiving meal from the traditional to a vegan and gluten-free version 10 years ago. Instead of turkey, I made a lentil loaf or pan seared tofu cubes. Instead of tradition stuffing, I switched to a gluten-free stuffing but that was expensive so I switched again to wild rice. Instead of a green bean casserole, I make fresh green beans sauteed with onion and garlic. Instead of creamy sweet potatoes with marshmellows, I roast a whole bunch of vegetables. Sometimes I add butternut squash soup. This year may may do a butternut squash lasagna. By Jacquelyn Van Sant
In my family, we really enjoy yams that have candied pecans and toasted coconut on top. No traditional marshmallows for us. By Amanda Davis
We do a traditional thanksgiving (turkey, ham, dressing, sweet potato casserole, green beans, mashed potatoes, bread, etc.) but we do chocolate gravy + biscuits on Christmas morning and a fish fry at my grandma’s Christmas that we celebrate on New Year’s Eve 😊 By Whitney Eddy
In Texas, we do tamales with sides on Christmas Eve. Yum! Thanksgiving is traditional but simple, and Christmas Day I change up every year. I make cinnamon rolls and bacon on Christmas morning though. By Yvette Lewis
My family is Polish Catholic. We grew up with a traditional meatless Christmas Eve and passing around the blessed communion bread before our fish feast. Then we always went to midnight mass💓 although I am no longer Catholic i still love this tradition! By Jamie Taylor
We replicate my grandmother’s best cakes. She passed years ago when I was in high school, but she used to make wonderful cakes on Sundays. She would have my aunts do the work when she couldn’t get around easily anymore. If they weren’t right, she’d make them throw them out and start over. And she’d only used we’ll known brands. The mainstays we’re her German Chocolate, Carrot and her Butter Pound cakes. By Ria Sides
Hm…we have a friendsgiving celebration because we live far from family. It’s become a little tradition of our own. By Eric Nevins
Thanksgiving:DEEP-FRIED Turkey (if possible)Stove atop is a must-haveGreen bean casserole
“The Godfather” marathon plays on tv non-stop the way “A Christmas Story” is played repeatedly on Christmas. Once the Dallas Cowboys game starts, I’m told to stop making fun of them unless I want to watch the game from outside like when I first married into the family. My in-laws are funny. By Jerry Dugan
My family has roots in Minnesota, up by Leech Lake, where wild rice (not actually rice at all) grows, so that’s always been a staple of our Thanksgiving & Christmas meals. My mom always makes a Bundt cake that never actually makes it to the dinner because everyone snacks on it throughout the day. Deviled eggs are a must! And the canned jellied cranberry sauce. One time, I tried to be awesome and make my own. You would’ve thought I ruined the whole dinner. Lol. By Magan Dotson Martin
My family has always made chocolates to give to friends. Three of my sibs have always gathered in my mothers’ basement to make theirs–about 300 pounds all told. Since Mom hasn’t been involved for several years, they also make it for her gift list. They can’t do that this year because of COVID, but they have complicated plans to make certain things at their own homes and somehow trade so everyone they give to will receive a somewhat normal assortment. By David Guion
I cook with a fair amount of Bourbon and Craft Beer during the holidays. My Orange, Cranberry, Honey Bourbon Glazed Turkey and Craft Beer Crockpot Mac & Cheese are two of our family favorites. German Stollen, Glühwein and Jaegermeister are also holiday staples. I cook a pretty mean Portuguese-Style Roast (beef) too.
By Joe Chadburn
Now I will share my family traditions with y’all ♥️♥️♥️
Thanksgiving traditions for us are pretty traditional for this area. We usually are at my mom and dads. We have Turkey, cornbread dressing, scalloped potatoes, broccoli cheese casserole, mashed potatoes if we don’t have scalloped, chicken and noodles, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie and whatever extra we do that day. We always eat about 1pm. Most of the time my brother and parents try to hunt that morning and that evening. We are not big football watchers so that is not a standard tradition around here for us lol. Growing up we put the Christmas tree up the next day. I use to do the same but now I put it up whenever I’m in the mood lol. It might be the first week of November or this year idk when. It’s been hard getting into the Holiday mood this year. I’m working on it. Yesterday I got all my Christmas decor out of storage. So today I will clean house and get ready for the mood to hit 🤪
Christmas traditions…growing up we always went to my Aunt Nonnies on Christmas Eve. Honestly I don’t remember much on the foods except my grandma nanny always made cheesecake for Holidays. It’s a jello cheesecake that is light and fluffy. Mmm I will add the recipe link below. My aunt passed away when I was 16 and that changed things up for us. My mom now has Christmas on Christmas Eve since we are grown with families. We get to continue on the traditions. So back to growing up!!! We would get up early Christmas morning and have muffins. We had blueberry 🫐 muffins fresh out of the oven. We always had our Christmas stockings and gifts. I think we also got to open a gift Christmas eve. Just one though. We would do our Christmas at home and then go to my grandparents house for a huge Gilman family Christmas.
Skipping a head to my own traditions for my family. The kids and I (after divorce) have our Christmas whenever was easiest for us. I always tried to work around other schedules so there was no stress. I still do the same now that they have their families. We do snack style foods. Little smokies, cheese ball, cheese, chips and cheese dip, fudge if I get it made lol, one time we made little pizzas…
Last year we did taco themed. I think they like the snack style better. We may mix it up and have small amount of other foods and snacks. Oh and I try to either fix blueberry muffins or cinnamon rolls. We always do 4 things that never change.
1. We always have communion with sparkly grape juice 🥤 or Christmas punch
2. We always read the Christmas story in Luke.
3. Each kid gets a movie for Christmas. When the kids were at home we did that the night before our Christmas. We would have a movie marathon and watch their movies that night. I miss that 😢. Treasure your traditions and memories.
4. Each kid gets a Christmas stocking. I mean grown kids and the little ones. 🎄♥️
Those are things we don’t waiver from. The day and the foods can always change up but it’s important to hold down traditions and memories to pass on to your children if they choose to use any of them. ♥️. There are things that absolutely have to change when your children begin to have families of their own. For example I can’t wake up at my moms and eat blueberry muffins that morning like I did as a kid ☹️😢😭. Life grows and changes and traditions can change and be passed down. 😍🥰.
I hope you have enjoyed this blog. Please send me some of your traditions.
https://crossgbackyardfarms.com/holiday-recipegrandma-nannies-fluffy-cheescake/
Dreamcatcher320
Cassie
When I was at conference this year I shared with the ladies 2 situations about domestic violence that was in homes.
One was a home filled with meth and addiction. A very sad situation that even when there was intervention the cycle continued.
The second was about a couple who loved God with all their heart. They stood on a stage in front of church members who loved them and got engaged, then had a wedding filled with ministers and loved ones. They loved each other with all their BROKEN hearts. Anger, bad self images, jealousy, confusion, fear and strife grew stronger than their faith and love. Verbal, Emotional and Physical violence became a habit. Anywhere from throwing things to threats and manhandling.
Don’t think this only happens in low income, drug addicts, and “non believers” homes.
This couple didn’t survive. They now both thrive in their own walks and God has taken their broken hearts 💔 and mended them in His way and timing.
Don’t wait until it gets to the point of breaking apart what you have or who you are. Get help, reach out!
Most of all safety is your first step.
Then get help from Godly men and women who will speak truth, give accountability and LOVE beyond the shock factor and LOVE you through your brokenness to a mended heart ❤️.
It doesn’t have to end in divorce but if it does don’t you walk around in shame like I did for so long.
God still will mend
God will still love
God will still forgive
Courage
There are so many situations in our lives that take courage. I think one of the most courageous moments in my life was leaving the man I loved more than life itself.
I married in 2016 and shortly after our wedding it became apparent that we had a toxic relationship situation. The very first heated argument we had became physical real fast.
I have to say that I loved him and I believe he loved me. I believe people love out of their own hurts and what they know. I however didn’t love myself enough to see that love wasn’t enough.
I stayed and did this crazy cycle we had going on for 11 months. A month before our anniversary things escalated beyond anything I could imagine. I then realized that this was not only destroying me, but him and his ministry. Yes I said ministry. It takes a lot of courage to tell this story but I know God wants it told. So many behind church doors need the courage to make a change and get help. So I am sharing my story.
So one month from our anniversary, I put on my courage and drove away leaving him standing there crying and saying once again how sorry he was. I believe he truly meant that. However he knew he went too far, I knew he went too far.
I thought in my heart as I drove to Oklahoma to be with my children, this will be all right. I thought we will get help. I wanted to be somewhere I felt safe and get help for each of us.
Over the weeks and months to come I had to have courage to get out of bed and face the day knowing things were not going to be all right. I started my cleaning business here in Oklahoma as I kept hoping for a miracle. God blessed it so much that I was full time in 3 months.
Long story short is, we divorced. He met another woman and life goes on.
Now I walk in the courage to hold my head high and know God has great Big plans for CASSIE!
I have made some pretty big decisions lately that has taken a lot of courage. If you keep following me here on Instagram or my blog, you will get to read all about them.
““Be strong. Take courage. Don’t be intimidated. Don’t give them a second thought because GOD, your God, is striding ahead of you. He’s right there with you. He won’t let you down; he won’t leave you.””Deuteronomy 31:6 MSG
Dream Catcher 3:20Eph 3:20
Cassie Gilman
Sitting here looking at my memories on Facebook. Wow Gods brought
me a long ways since 2017. I had planned a trip down to Texas to see my husband, in hopes of reconciliation of some kind. Then when the hurricane hit and flooded Houston it caused a shortage on fuel down there. I was not able to go.
It sent things into another whirlwind of anger and strife. My head was spinning with grief and confusion.
I remember back to this season of my life. Many mornings, nights or maybe even just randomly in the middle of the day, being on my face crying so hard. I was grieving so hard that I didn’t even recognize my own voice or cries. It scared the heck out of me. I thought this grief would never end. There were moments I literally thought I was going to die from it.
Though my marriage was not restored, CASSIE was!
The grief didn’t stay. The tears didn’t stay. Now I still have moments of sadness and tears but nothing like the season I was in 3 years ago.
I have learned to be well ME!!!
I am still finding my way and BECOMING the CASSIE God created me to be.
It’s exciting
It can be scary lol but
It’s exciting
There are things happening that are great big BRAVE things in my life. I can’t wait to share them as they take place.
But most of all, the fact I didn’t quit is a great big BRAVE in my life.
Whatever your facing today, this time next year will not look the same.
Hold on to Gods love
Cry if you need to
Scream out if you need to
BUT DO NOT LET GO OF HOPE
Dream Catcher
Eph 3:20
Cassie
I asked my sweet friend Natasha to submit a recipe for my blog and I am super excited about this one. Pretzels are one of my favorite snacks and add some chocolate to it and mmm 😋
I had to add the fun name for this treat that they use at home. She wasn’t sure if I would want to use it but I loved it.
So here y’all go ZEBRA NIPPLE TREATS
Easy pretzel bites!
Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Place mini pretzels on the sheet and top each one with a Hershey’s Hugs drop. Put in the oven just long enough to slightly melt the chocolate drop. Top each drop with a red or green M&M. Allow to stand at room temp until chocolate is set! Store in an airtight container. Enjoy and share with friends and family!
To try more recipes from Natasha, click on the links below.
https://crossgbackyardfarms.com/holiday-recipmeemas-rolls/%0A
https://crossgbackyardfarms.com/holiday-recipesmeemas-famous-chicken-dressing/
https://crossgbackyardfarms.com/holiday-recipenanny-bugs-mandarain-orange-cake/
https://crossgbackyardfarms.com/holiday-recipegrandma-mcafees-blackberry-cobbler/
Thank you for reading my blogs!
Cassie Gilman
Eph 3:20
Happy Holiday season!
I love learning what other families holiday traditions are and especially their recipes they make for their holiday meals with.
Today I am featuring another bloggers Holiday recipes. I posted on Instagram and asked for people to submit their recipes to be featured and Ms Anna Dabill sent me a message and asked if she could submit her recipes and links. I was very excited and can’t wait to try some of these myself.
CLICK ON THE SMALLER PHOTO INSIDE THE 📦 ABOVE TO TAKE YOU TO THIS AMAZING RECIPE
Now who was drooling while looking at those photos and reading her blog and recipes? Okay let’s look at this next one! I wanted a hot cup of coffee to drink from just looking at the photos. I can’t wait to make these and sit down with friends and have a cup of coffee and sweet friendship time.
CLICK ON THE SMALLER PHOTO INSIDE THE 📦 ABOVE TO TAKE YOU TO THIS AMAZING RECIPE
Please take a few minutes and check out Anna’s website and be sure to follow all of her social media accounts as well.
If you have a Holiday recipe you would like to share with us, please email me at [email protected]
Have a Happy Thanksgiving 🍁🦃🍽
Cassie Gilman
Eph 3:20
